happy halloween...

I'm staying in tonight so instead I decided to dress up my avatar. Enjoy:

it's all coming back...

Been in Cologne this weekend. Nuff said. Except...

There were nights when the wind was so cold
That my body froze in bed if I just listened to it right outside the window

There were days when the sun was so cruel
That all the tears turned to dust and I just knew my eyes were drying up forever

I finished crying in the instant that you left
And I can't remember where or when or how
And I banished every memory you and I have ever made

But when you touch me like this
And you hold me like that
I just have to admit that it's all coming back to me
When I touch you like this
And I hold you like that
It's so hard to believe but it's all coming back to me now

It's all coming back
It's all coming back to me now

update update update...

• Weather: cloudy, too warm
• Mood: ok
• Weight: don't ask - I'm frustrated (haven't reached my goal yet)
• Soundtrack: The Caffrey Brothers

Well, here I am again. Kindly reminded of someone I don't even know personally yet, that I should keep up my good start in writing my blog. And right he is. The reasons I haven't written for such a long time are various: laziness, too little time, too much to tell...whatever.

Anyway, I'm now officially a Geordie!!! Yes, that's right. I was adopted by my beloved north-east this July at my graduation. *sniff* I miss England...

So now I'm in the job hunting process and there has come up a possibility. Everything sounds good so far but it's not sure yet. It would give me a great start in the music branch and help me to get fantastic contacts. On the downside it'd still be here in my hometown. I wish I could find something like that in London. As I said before, I miss England and I know that's where I feel like home. Honestly, I was even crying when I stood on the ferry in the morning when we arrived in Newcastle in July. Here in Germany is where my parents are, but somehow I feel that England is the place I belong to. Isn't that strange? Maybe I've lived there in a former life? Who knows...

Anyway, someday I'll move back. And someday I'll meet my dream man. And someday I'll be happy again...

In the meantime it's 10.30pm and I'm really proud of myself. I've actually dragged myself to the gym and went to a class called Ballet Balance. Yay! I feel like crap now and realised that I'm far from fit, but I want and must keep up the good start! I so want to get into a routine and manage to get that feeling that I don't feel comfortable without sport. Probably my goals are once again to high but one should never aim at mediocre, right? I want to get past that anxiousness when going to the gym on my own. Oh well, there's so much I want.